When I was younger and reading Order of the Phoenix, I didn’t know that punting meant like boating so when Fred and George make the swamp and Filch has to punt the students across I literally imagined him drop kicking them across
the fact that so many people in the notes thought the same and never questioned an adult straight up drop kicking students across a swamp just said what a train wreck this school is
I know we’re all used to the whole Scabbers is Pettigrew thing but can you imagine getting kidnapped by some dude and then your very professional teacher appears and points a gun at your dog and goes “Mr. Sprinkles is a war criminal”
the older i get the more i realize what it meant for lily and james potter to die at 21. when you’re 11 and you’re reading the books, watching the films, 21 feels ancient. it did to me. even the actors they picked looked like they were in their thirties, because actual 21 year olds standing next to harry in the mirror would have been an excruciating sight i think. actual 21 year olds lined up in the photo sirius shows harry would have been horrible to see. they weren’t adults. i look at 21 year olds now and most of them are still teenagers. and i’m so sad because you know harry turns 21 and then 22 and then 28 and 29 and realizes how terribly young his parents were, how brave they were, how exceptional they were, GOD I’M SAD IM GETTING A BEER
the real reason dumbledore ain’t gonna be gay in the newest film is because jude law took one look at johnny depp and refused to even pretend to have affection for that bleached little not-colin-farell
Every Adult In “Harry Potter” Let Us Down At Some Point And That’s Important a 900 page dissertation by me
And that includes Joanne Kathleen Rowling a tear stained afterword by me
Hagrid Is The Exception a rebuttal by me
The Time Hagrid Told Voldemort How to Take Out Something Protecting an Object that Grants Immortality When He Was Drunk and Other Well-Meaning Fuck Ups a lengthy chapter
“If you’d like to see what the diadem’s supposed to look like, I could take you up to our common room and show you, Harry. Ravenclaw’s wearing it in her statue.”
